Day 8: Totally on top of it
The last two days of reading have contained so many leaps, I don’t even know where to start! First off, Hal…Hal, Hal, Hal. What a guy. Don’t you think it was a little too Fight Club when we found out that he and Gately are really the same person? David Foster Wallace, do try a little harder. You’ve been so original otherwise. And the Quebecois terrorists! Up to no good as usual. I’m glad they finally succeeded and we can get on with everyone trying to find Mario Incandenza a girlfriend. That scene where they all give him dating tips? Classic. As classic as that tennis showdown between the teachers and the students of the Academy. The vocabulary’s getting a little easier, don’t you think?
Shit, you caught me.
This unfortunate reader has caught the winter flu. I don’t have bronchitis, thank the God that Chris Le doesn’t believe in. You know, I kind of feel like that “cool medical problem” picture you found on Google Images. I indeed am wearing a coat of leaves (”sweat”) and am growing hair that takes the shape of cartoonish devil’s horns (”more sweat”). I don’t have a magical sprig of mountain herbs to sniff and make me feel better, unless you count extra strength tylenol (or as DFW would probably call them: mild acetaminophen capsules).
I am not in the mood to actually look up the words that you gave me. So I’ll just wing it instead. Here we go!
1. Doctor, can you really get pyorrhea just by frenching someone?
2. Shoot, out of all the Pokemon I could have left at home, why did I forget my Teratoid?
3. Well, the recipe says to add a half kilo of tofu, but I think I’m going to use scrofula instead.
4. Of course you don’t look fat, honey. You look absolutely lycanthropically hirsute!
5. Ever since I went on that pasta binge in 2001, I’ve been torticollic. I know, it’s a pain for everyone.
Since I didn’t read, I can’t give you real words that I found. But I can give you words that I’m pretty sure DFW used in the last 70 pages:
1. tennis
2. cartridge
3. Quebec
4. and
5. howling fantods
Next topic, per your sister’s request: how to comfortably hold a 1000+ page novel. And maybe I’ll actually talk about the book a little just to prove that I’m actually reading.
